Just thought it was time to re-visit the Personal Perspectives side of life. Gentlemen, you will most likely want to skip this one!
The last time I delved into these areas was 10th April – I just went back and re-read that blog and thought I would re-address some of the issues raised there.
Firstly, I must say, we are completely addicted to this lifestyle. In fact, we are seriously concerned as to how we will ever settle down to a ‘normal’ life again. What makes it so wonderful, well......I guess to be honest one of the main factors is that it is an almost completely irresponsible way of living. Day to day chores are minimal, I mean girls, it really doesn’t take much effort to keep a caravan clean and tidy. I must confess here that the van is not always clean and tidy and, you know what, I don’t really care. Doug is pretty carefree about outside matters and I have finally relaxed about that too. We do frequently resemble nothing more than a repository for rubbish, but hey, what does it really matter? Aside from the lack of hard yakka there is the constant supply of outstanding scenery, new places to explore, new people to meet (and easy escape from those you have had enough of), a lifestyle that is as social or anti-social as you wish to make it, lots and lots of lovely quiet time to spend doing whatever tickles your fancy, you know the stuff, reading, walking, ‘putering, knitting, sewing, writing, painting, sketching, watching TV or DVDs, or just simply lazing around watching the world and other people go by. That might bore some people to tears, but it suits me and him down to the ground. This is the first time in my entire life that I have been able to spend my time selfishly and not feel bad about it – I just love it!
Of course, we have had our hiccups. There is a knack to spending 24/7 together and there have been times (lots) when I have seriously wanted to scream and shout and smack ‘someone’ about – but these times pass. I wouldn’t dream of imagining that TBBITW doesn’t often feel the same about me – I know I can be a real trial at times. One of the secrets is to spend time doing different things – not always easy, especially if the weather doesn’t permit much outside activity. I know I am a pain for saying it, but our weather dilemmas have eddied around too much heat – I know it sounds odd, but really, I can’t expect the bloke to go out and play golf in the heat, especially as he has had a couple of nasty turns in the past due to dehydration on the golf course. Considering my beloved’s penchant for golf, it is surprising to note that he has not had the clubs out once this year! Truly amazing. Of late, I am pleased to report that the man has taken up reading. In fact he has polished off several books in very quick time indeed – I am thrilled and seriously hope it continues – I have always felt that he was missing out, not being a reader. Of course, it also helps that he can disappear into a book while I am otherwise occupied. We do seem to have more upsets around the time of the full moon – I have long been a believer in the detrimental effects of the full moon – of course the real question is..........who is being adversely effected, me or him? Naturally I think he is the one who goes slightly loopy, but the odds are the very fact that I think that, may very well indicate that it is me who goes ever so slightly around the proverbial bend. Anyone who has worked closely with the general public will emphasise with the ‘full moon theories’.
Health-wise, well, I have just read the last blog where I declared that we had been bad and were not going to be very good, no sundowners, smaller servings and more exercise, well I have to report that ...................................................................Nothing much has changed! Over the duration many such declarations have been made and many such good beginnings have been made with several days quick marching and a few smaller meals, but really in all honesty, I have to say nothing much has really changed. We do still avoid munchies with our evening libation as much as is politely possible, I have reduced the size of the meals somewhat, we do have less cooked breakfasts and more Sultana Bran and fruit, we are marginally more active than we were then, and do periodically start serious walking, but generally what happens, is exactly as it has over the last couple of days, the heat comes in and the walking goes out! My knees are giving me curry and of course that is a round-about in itself – pain equals less exercise equals more pain, etc, etc. I am pretty sure I have gained at least one ‘dress size’ and himself has increased the size of the veranda that shades his feet. On the up-side tho’ we are about as stressed as a couple of jelly-fish, so it can’t be all bad. We do monitor our blood pressure periodically and we both seem to be holding our own in that area. I have deliberately not checked sugar levels as I can usually tell when they are high. I have recently increased my medication in that area and feel pretty good at the moment. Of course in both the blood pressure and sugar departments, exercise is one of the best cures. I know! Why don’t’ I check my levels, ‘cause I believe that you can actually adversely affect your health by obsessing over the details. I do believe that you can ‘think’ yourself both well and ill.
Other than these issues, himself has an almost permanently sore head due to his constant head-butting of every part of the caravan both internal and external that his tall stance will reach. There is one particularly bone crunching shelf in the van which we have both had serious encounters with and have both suspected actual concussion as a result. The constant smoke and wind in the NT and upper North West combined to give me a fairly serious eye problem, which after some really poor advice from one chemist and then some excellent advice from another, I finally fixed with anti-biotic drops – it was quite nasty for a while as I couldn’t read, watch telly, go outside, etc, etc. In a caravan, that is quite a problem. It still niggles a little, but I keep an eye on it (sorry about the pun) to keep it at bay. Other than that and a few random scrapes and bruises, (twice from falling over on my part), we are doing well health-wise. We have both acquired fairly substantial tans, safely I might add, just by being out here.
Oh, I just realised that I had not mentioned alcohol intake, .........well, I still pretty much stick to my standard 2 per night, very light on the rum and a big glass of Diet Ginger Beer chock full of ice blocks which make it last just so much longer. The bloke fluctuates a bit, but lately has been quite demure in his intake. One interesting thing is that he had a couple of red wines the other night and had a shocking night’s sleep as a consequence, so we think that until we get back to Perth and are able to get hold of the preservative free stuff we might cross the red wine off the list. Interestingly while we were in the Territory and further north in WA we were restricted in what we could buy booze- wise (due to the ‘Intervention’) and I think we benefited by our enforced partial abstinence. We did buy a super luscious bottle of Kununurra Chocolate/Coffee Rum Liqueur which we have tippled over the last couple of nights, needless to say we only have the one bottle and that will soon be gone, so back to the somewhat straight and narrow after that.
Looking back at my first ‘Personal Perspective’ entry, it is interesting to see that I was feeling a bit like a fish out of water being out of WA, well as you would expect, that has passed and I now feel like ‘an Australian’ more than a West Australian. The parochial attitudes we left home with seem to have been left along the roadside somewhere. The only time they surface really is around footy matches, and hey, who would have missed the Eagles matches this year anyway? A good year to be away footy-wise! I have learnt to look forward to finding out what fresh produce is available in the different areas, and to be painfully honest, wherever possible I shop at Woollies, so nothing really changes. It was really only on the Eyre Peninsula that things seemed so different and I think that is due to that area really being a little world all of its own.
Family-wise, well I have become used to the fact that we do most of the contacting of children, rather than the recipients of phone calls from them. We accept the fact that a) they all have super busy lives and b) pretty much an out of sight out of mind attitude prevails. Kids, I am not saying you never call, only that you rarely call, and that is OK! All the family is doing well – Brett and Nom are expecting a new addition on Dec 3rd and we will be home in time for the big event. Just before I get to that, I have adopted the habit of sending all the younger grandchildren little parcels from time to time (and mother too) and I am told they just love getting real mail. I enjoy sending them the little bits and pieces and I think it is a good way of staying in their little memory banks.
So, that brings me to the point where we are heading home! Why you may well ask. Believe me, we also ask that question. It is not a matter of wanting to go home, trust me, but more a feeling of ‘The Right Thing To Do’! Had we continued across the bottom of the country and up the East coast as first planned, I doubt we would now be heading homewards, but as we were heading to Darwin ‘up the centre’, it became a question of which way to turn when we hit the top. Two things were paramount in our minds, the birth of a grandchild and the welfare of an ageing mother.
As far as the birth of another grandchild is concerned, had it just been a normal situation I would probably just have boarded a plane and flown home to see the new bub on his or her arrival, but due to the complex health status of my daughter-in-law we (read I) felt we should be there at the birth. Please do not interpret my actions as being in any regard negative, I just wanted to be there.
Regarding mum, well, that is far more complicated. From what I can gauge, she is doing reasonably well, BUT.................from what she tells me, she has not had a good year health-wise. Nothing super serious, just a lot of colds and viral infections. I sense that she is run down and is not able to get herself back to a strong position from where she can fight off new colds etc. Despite having some wonderful assistance from our very good friends Sue and Rob, she is still finding it tough not having us around for the little things. She is proudly independent and really doesn’t like to ask for help from people outside the immediate family (read Doug and myself). Mum turned 85 this year, in WA that means actually taking a driving test to determine whether or not you are still able to drive safely. This has turned out to be extremely traumatic for mum. Firstly, her eyesight is deteriorating to a degree where she has trouble focusing. She tells me that she can see quite well into the distance, but closer is more difficult – this means she cannot really see the speedo and has very little idea of her actual speed. She compensates for this by just working with the flow of traffic – not good enough for a driving test I am afraid. Mum has always had a tendency to drive to the middle of the road (many, many nightmares throughout my life!) and still does this, of course, her reaction times now are much slower and that is a considerable problem. She passed the Dr’s eye and cognitive tests, but sadly did not pass the driving test. Not to be defeated, she took the test again, twice and finally passed! This means she is on the road for another 12 months. Now, girls, I know you will know what I mean when I say I have mixed emotions about this. Part of me is so happy for her to have maintained a very important degree of independence but part of me is truly worried about her. Mum is a realist however, and has decided she will catch the bus some,
use the local help some and drive some. She will avoid (as she always does) driving in the rain or going anywhere where there is a heavy or dangerous traffic flow. Still.................................!
The whole experience was pretty awful for her. My mum has never until now, failed anything. At school, as she is so fond of telling me, she never achieved a pass mark below 90%! It was distressing for her to fail and of course it made her question her abilities in so many more ways. Old age can be a cow I think.
On account of all of the things that make up mum’s life, we are very inclined to think we may not be able, in all conscience, to leave Perth once we get back there. Needless to say, it has plunged us into considerable gloom, just thinking about it. Our pace has slowed considerably since we realised this may be the situation. If indeed, we are compelled to stay in Perth, we don’t plan to get rid of the van, but maybe to live in it outside of mum’s house, or at least somewhere very close-by. We will however take a trip across the middle early in the new year with the intention of having the car and van ferried across to Tasmania where we will spend a 2 or 3 months before coming back to WA to bight the proverbial bullet.
All of this raised some interesting and important questions about obligation and responsibility, where the lines are and what the expectations should be. A subject I might add which is discussed frequently with our fellow travellers, many of whom have similar situations. There is as far as I am concerned, only one real issue, LOVE. Mum and I, like so many other mother-daughters have had an often difficult relationship and I do mean difficult in the extreme. There have been periods in our lives where we didn’t even speak to each other and times where we both blamed the other for things and attitudes that we disagreed with. This is all irrelevant. My mother has no one else to really care about her, and although ‘we are what we reap’ and much of her situation may be of her own creation, that doesn’t mean that I can sit by and allow her to spend the last years of her life alone and afraid. I feel that is what many old people are, alone and afraid and it’s an awful indictment on our society. For as long as it is in my power, I won’t allow that to be mum’s reality. Aside from all that and regardless of old history, I love my mum and want to be with her when it really counts. Que Serra! Fortunately for both mum and me, Doug not only understands, but also agrees with my perspective.
Of course, having said all of this doesn’t mean that I am actually looking forward to being at home and with mum for a big part of my day. I am actually dreading it! Now that I have actually experienced having time for myself, I am just soooooooo not looking forward to losing that wonderful benefit. TBBITW will be OK as he will be able to bugger off and play golf at least a couple of time a week, but it will be more difficult for me. I can see that any action on our part will have to be prefaced by a long talk with mum to try to get her to understand that I will need my own time. Not an easy thing to convince mum of without her becoming miffed – something she is very very good at. Mum always believes the worst of people and is always quite sure people are out to upset or hurt her. Subsequently, as she often imagines this, it is frequently self-fulfilling. Oh well, I guess I am just going to have to deal with all of this when the time comes. No amount of fretting now will help anything, quite the contrary in fact. It occurs to me that I must sound so selfish and self-absorbed, especially to those amongst us who live their lives for their family. Sorry, but this lifestyle is addictive and thoughts of becoming self-sacrificing don’t sit easy.
Spiritual Matters – well they sort of take care of themselves at the moment. I have read a couple of wonderful books by Caroline Myss and have another of hers there to read. As I write this I am remembering that I am supposed to be working thru’ my life and eliminating any residual negativity. I confess, I haven’t done any of that ‘work’ for a few months now. I guess I had better get a move on if I want to finish that before we get home! Hmm. As this lifestyle allows so many private moments for quiet reflection, and I am constantly being shown so much natural beauty, Spiritual Growth just seems to happen. As I hear of loved ones who are battling different ailments and life problems, the power of prayer and meditation really comes to the fore, and as my mind is reasonably quiet I actually do feel the power of these actions. I can’t speak for the bloke, but I feel quite well spiritually, and that is without any real action on my part. Very Taoist I think.
In our travels I rarely have spiritual conversations with other travellers, but once in a while there is a notable exception to that rule. Whilst in Jabiru I met a lovely lady called Anne and whilst sitting in a cool and sheltered spot in the swimming pool, we managed to have a wonderful conversation about both religion and politics – two of the forbidden subjects! It was delightful. Also while in Darwin, new chums we met there lent me a truly interesting book about ‘the other side’ – sorry I can’t remember the name or author, but it had a big impact on me and broadened my perspectives yet again. I always think that spiritual growth (for want of a different tag) is a very fluid thing – I don’t know about you but my belief systems over the years have changed, changed and changed yet again, taking me in all sorts of amazing directions. Even books of fiction can open windows for exploration. If I had to encapsulate my spiritual beliefs or status, I could do so with just one word, JOY ..........................I feel filled to the brim and overflowing with the JOY of my existence and the existence of a greater power. God fills me with love and that love overflows from me and passes on to all I encounter. I know that those of you who know me will be totally amazed to hear me spouting words like Love and God, as generally I keep my beliefs much to myself – just on this occasion however, let me show you a tiny fragment of my soul. Where you take it is entirely up to you.
In conclusion, over -all impressions – am I still as happy with our decision to sell up and travel Oz – ABSOLUTELY – I am so happy and feel so fortunate to have had this experience, and look forward to many many more ks before we have to finally bring the van to rest.
Wishing you all love, wisdom and good health – Stephanie.
The last time I delved into these areas was 10th April – I just went back and re-read that blog and thought I would re-address some of the issues raised there.
Firstly, I must say, we are completely addicted to this lifestyle. In fact, we are seriously concerned as to how we will ever settle down to a ‘normal’ life again. What makes it so wonderful, well......I guess to be honest one of the main factors is that it is an almost completely irresponsible way of living. Day to day chores are minimal, I mean girls, it really doesn’t take much effort to keep a caravan clean and tidy. I must confess here that the van is not always clean and tidy and, you know what, I don’t really care. Doug is pretty carefree about outside matters and I have finally relaxed about that too. We do frequently resemble nothing more than a repository for rubbish, but hey, what does it really matter? Aside from the lack of hard yakka there is the constant supply of outstanding scenery, new places to explore, new people to meet (and easy escape from those you have had enough of), a lifestyle that is as social or anti-social as you wish to make it, lots and lots of lovely quiet time to spend doing whatever tickles your fancy, you know the stuff, reading, walking, ‘putering, knitting, sewing, writing, painting, sketching, watching TV or DVDs, or just simply lazing around watching the world and other people go by. That might bore some people to tears, but it suits me and him down to the ground. This is the first time in my entire life that I have been able to spend my time selfishly and not feel bad about it – I just love it!
Of course, we have had our hiccups. There is a knack to spending 24/7 together and there have been times (lots) when I have seriously wanted to scream and shout and smack ‘someone’ about – but these times pass. I wouldn’t dream of imagining that TBBITW doesn’t often feel the same about me – I know I can be a real trial at times. One of the secrets is to spend time doing different things – not always easy, especially if the weather doesn’t permit much outside activity. I know I am a pain for saying it, but our weather dilemmas have eddied around too much heat – I know it sounds odd, but really, I can’t expect the bloke to go out and play golf in the heat, especially as he has had a couple of nasty turns in the past due to dehydration on the golf course. Considering my beloved’s penchant for golf, it is surprising to note that he has not had the clubs out once this year! Truly amazing. Of late, I am pleased to report that the man has taken up reading. In fact he has polished off several books in very quick time indeed – I am thrilled and seriously hope it continues – I have always felt that he was missing out, not being a reader. Of course, it also helps that he can disappear into a book while I am otherwise occupied. We do seem to have more upsets around the time of the full moon – I have long been a believer in the detrimental effects of the full moon – of course the real question is..........who is being adversely effected, me or him? Naturally I think he is the one who goes slightly loopy, but the odds are the very fact that I think that, may very well indicate that it is me who goes ever so slightly around the proverbial bend. Anyone who has worked closely with the general public will emphasise with the ‘full moon theories’.
Health-wise, well, I have just read the last blog where I declared that we had been bad and were not going to be very good, no sundowners, smaller servings and more exercise, well I have to report that ...................................................................Nothing much has changed! Over the duration many such declarations have been made and many such good beginnings have been made with several days quick marching and a few smaller meals, but really in all honesty, I have to say nothing much has really changed. We do still avoid munchies with our evening libation as much as is politely possible, I have reduced the size of the meals somewhat, we do have less cooked breakfasts and more Sultana Bran and fruit, we are marginally more active than we were then, and do periodically start serious walking, but generally what happens, is exactly as it has over the last couple of days, the heat comes in and the walking goes out! My knees are giving me curry and of course that is a round-about in itself – pain equals less exercise equals more pain, etc, etc. I am pretty sure I have gained at least one ‘dress size’ and himself has increased the size of the veranda that shades his feet. On the up-side tho’ we are about as stressed as a couple of jelly-fish, so it can’t be all bad. We do monitor our blood pressure periodically and we both seem to be holding our own in that area. I have deliberately not checked sugar levels as I can usually tell when they are high. I have recently increased my medication in that area and feel pretty good at the moment. Of course in both the blood pressure and sugar departments, exercise is one of the best cures. I know! Why don’t’ I check my levels, ‘cause I believe that you can actually adversely affect your health by obsessing over the details. I do believe that you can ‘think’ yourself both well and ill.
Other than these issues, himself has an almost permanently sore head due to his constant head-butting of every part of the caravan both internal and external that his tall stance will reach. There is one particularly bone crunching shelf in the van which we have both had serious encounters with and have both suspected actual concussion as a result. The constant smoke and wind in the NT and upper North West combined to give me a fairly serious eye problem, which after some really poor advice from one chemist and then some excellent advice from another, I finally fixed with anti-biotic drops – it was quite nasty for a while as I couldn’t read, watch telly, go outside, etc, etc. In a caravan, that is quite a problem. It still niggles a little, but I keep an eye on it (sorry about the pun) to keep it at bay. Other than that and a few random scrapes and bruises, (twice from falling over on my part), we are doing well health-wise. We have both acquired fairly substantial tans, safely I might add, just by being out here.
Oh, I just realised that I had not mentioned alcohol intake, .........well, I still pretty much stick to my standard 2 per night, very light on the rum and a big glass of Diet Ginger Beer chock full of ice blocks which make it last just so much longer. The bloke fluctuates a bit, but lately has been quite demure in his intake. One interesting thing is that he had a couple of red wines the other night and had a shocking night’s sleep as a consequence, so we think that until we get back to Perth and are able to get hold of the preservative free stuff we might cross the red wine off the list. Interestingly while we were in the Territory and further north in WA we were restricted in what we could buy booze- wise (due to the ‘Intervention’) and I think we benefited by our enforced partial abstinence. We did buy a super luscious bottle of Kununurra Chocolate/Coffee Rum Liqueur which we have tippled over the last couple of nights, needless to say we only have the one bottle and that will soon be gone, so back to the somewhat straight and narrow after that.
Looking back at my first ‘Personal Perspective’ entry, it is interesting to see that I was feeling a bit like a fish out of water being out of WA, well as you would expect, that has passed and I now feel like ‘an Australian’ more than a West Australian. The parochial attitudes we left home with seem to have been left along the roadside somewhere. The only time they surface really is around footy matches, and hey, who would have missed the Eagles matches this year anyway? A good year to be away footy-wise! I have learnt to look forward to finding out what fresh produce is available in the different areas, and to be painfully honest, wherever possible I shop at Woollies, so nothing really changes. It was really only on the Eyre Peninsula that things seemed so different and I think that is due to that area really being a little world all of its own.
Family-wise, well I have become used to the fact that we do most of the contacting of children, rather than the recipients of phone calls from them. We accept the fact that a) they all have super busy lives and b) pretty much an out of sight out of mind attitude prevails. Kids, I am not saying you never call, only that you rarely call, and that is OK! All the family is doing well – Brett and Nom are expecting a new addition on Dec 3rd and we will be home in time for the big event. Just before I get to that, I have adopted the habit of sending all the younger grandchildren little parcels from time to time (and mother too) and I am told they just love getting real mail. I enjoy sending them the little bits and pieces and I think it is a good way of staying in their little memory banks.
So, that brings me to the point where we are heading home! Why you may well ask. Believe me, we also ask that question. It is not a matter of wanting to go home, trust me, but more a feeling of ‘The Right Thing To Do’! Had we continued across the bottom of the country and up the East coast as first planned, I doubt we would now be heading homewards, but as we were heading to Darwin ‘up the centre’, it became a question of which way to turn when we hit the top. Two things were paramount in our minds, the birth of a grandchild and the welfare of an ageing mother.
As far as the birth of another grandchild is concerned, had it just been a normal situation I would probably just have boarded a plane and flown home to see the new bub on his or her arrival, but due to the complex health status of my daughter-in-law we (read I) felt we should be there at the birth. Please do not interpret my actions as being in any regard negative, I just wanted to be there.
Regarding mum, well, that is far more complicated. From what I can gauge, she is doing reasonably well, BUT.................from what she tells me, she has not had a good year health-wise. Nothing super serious, just a lot of colds and viral infections. I sense that she is run down and is not able to get herself back to a strong position from where she can fight off new colds etc. Despite having some wonderful assistance from our very good friends Sue and Rob, she is still finding it tough not having us around for the little things. She is proudly independent and really doesn’t like to ask for help from people outside the immediate family (read Doug and myself). Mum turned 85 this year, in WA that means actually taking a driving test to determine whether or not you are still able to drive safely. This has turned out to be extremely traumatic for mum. Firstly, her eyesight is deteriorating to a degree where she has trouble focusing. She tells me that she can see quite well into the distance, but closer is more difficult – this means she cannot really see the speedo and has very little idea of her actual speed. She compensates for this by just working with the flow of traffic – not good enough for a driving test I am afraid. Mum has always had a tendency to drive to the middle of the road (many, many nightmares throughout my life!) and still does this, of course, her reaction times now are much slower and that is a considerable problem. She passed the Dr’s eye and cognitive tests, but sadly did not pass the driving test. Not to be defeated, she took the test again, twice and finally passed! This means she is on the road for another 12 months. Now, girls, I know you will know what I mean when I say I have mixed emotions about this. Part of me is so happy for her to have maintained a very important degree of independence but part of me is truly worried about her. Mum is a realist however, and has decided she will catch the bus some,
use the local help some and drive some. She will avoid (as she always does) driving in the rain or going anywhere where there is a heavy or dangerous traffic flow. Still.................................!
The whole experience was pretty awful for her. My mum has never until now, failed anything. At school, as she is so fond of telling me, she never achieved a pass mark below 90%! It was distressing for her to fail and of course it made her question her abilities in so many more ways. Old age can be a cow I think.
On account of all of the things that make up mum’s life, we are very inclined to think we may not be able, in all conscience, to leave Perth once we get back there. Needless to say, it has plunged us into considerable gloom, just thinking about it. Our pace has slowed considerably since we realised this may be the situation. If indeed, we are compelled to stay in Perth, we don’t plan to get rid of the van, but maybe to live in it outside of mum’s house, or at least somewhere very close-by. We will however take a trip across the middle early in the new year with the intention of having the car and van ferried across to Tasmania where we will spend a 2 or 3 months before coming back to WA to bight the proverbial bullet.
All of this raised some interesting and important questions about obligation and responsibility, where the lines are and what the expectations should be. A subject I might add which is discussed frequently with our fellow travellers, many of whom have similar situations. There is as far as I am concerned, only one real issue, LOVE. Mum and I, like so many other mother-daughters have had an often difficult relationship and I do mean difficult in the extreme. There have been periods in our lives where we didn’t even speak to each other and times where we both blamed the other for things and attitudes that we disagreed with. This is all irrelevant. My mother has no one else to really care about her, and although ‘we are what we reap’ and much of her situation may be of her own creation, that doesn’t mean that I can sit by and allow her to spend the last years of her life alone and afraid. I feel that is what many old people are, alone and afraid and it’s an awful indictment on our society. For as long as it is in my power, I won’t allow that to be mum’s reality. Aside from all that and regardless of old history, I love my mum and want to be with her when it really counts. Que Serra! Fortunately for both mum and me, Doug not only understands, but also agrees with my perspective.
Of course, having said all of this doesn’t mean that I am actually looking forward to being at home and with mum for a big part of my day. I am actually dreading it! Now that I have actually experienced having time for myself, I am just soooooooo not looking forward to losing that wonderful benefit. TBBITW will be OK as he will be able to bugger off and play golf at least a couple of time a week, but it will be more difficult for me. I can see that any action on our part will have to be prefaced by a long talk with mum to try to get her to understand that I will need my own time. Not an easy thing to convince mum of without her becoming miffed – something she is very very good at. Mum always believes the worst of people and is always quite sure people are out to upset or hurt her. Subsequently, as she often imagines this, it is frequently self-fulfilling. Oh well, I guess I am just going to have to deal with all of this when the time comes. No amount of fretting now will help anything, quite the contrary in fact. It occurs to me that I must sound so selfish and self-absorbed, especially to those amongst us who live their lives for their family. Sorry, but this lifestyle is addictive and thoughts of becoming self-sacrificing don’t sit easy.
Spiritual Matters – well they sort of take care of themselves at the moment. I have read a couple of wonderful books by Caroline Myss and have another of hers there to read. As I write this I am remembering that I am supposed to be working thru’ my life and eliminating any residual negativity. I confess, I haven’t done any of that ‘work’ for a few months now. I guess I had better get a move on if I want to finish that before we get home! Hmm. As this lifestyle allows so many private moments for quiet reflection, and I am constantly being shown so much natural beauty, Spiritual Growth just seems to happen. As I hear of loved ones who are battling different ailments and life problems, the power of prayer and meditation really comes to the fore, and as my mind is reasonably quiet I actually do feel the power of these actions. I can’t speak for the bloke, but I feel quite well spiritually, and that is without any real action on my part. Very Taoist I think.
In our travels I rarely have spiritual conversations with other travellers, but once in a while there is a notable exception to that rule. Whilst in Jabiru I met a lovely lady called Anne and whilst sitting in a cool and sheltered spot in the swimming pool, we managed to have a wonderful conversation about both religion and politics – two of the forbidden subjects! It was delightful. Also while in Darwin, new chums we met there lent me a truly interesting book about ‘the other side’ – sorry I can’t remember the name or author, but it had a big impact on me and broadened my perspectives yet again. I always think that spiritual growth (for want of a different tag) is a very fluid thing – I don’t know about you but my belief systems over the years have changed, changed and changed yet again, taking me in all sorts of amazing directions. Even books of fiction can open windows for exploration. If I had to encapsulate my spiritual beliefs or status, I could do so with just one word, JOY ..........................I feel filled to the brim and overflowing with the JOY of my existence and the existence of a greater power. God fills me with love and that love overflows from me and passes on to all I encounter. I know that those of you who know me will be totally amazed to hear me spouting words like Love and God, as generally I keep my beliefs much to myself – just on this occasion however, let me show you a tiny fragment of my soul. Where you take it is entirely up to you.
In conclusion, over -all impressions – am I still as happy with our decision to sell up and travel Oz – ABSOLUTELY – I am so happy and feel so fortunate to have had this experience, and look forward to many many more ks before we have to finally bring the van to rest.
Wishing you all love, wisdom and good health – Stephanie.
No comments:
Post a Comment